So the prison I’m in is 75% sexual offenders. And people let me be flat out honest. You should have a healthy reserve for the guy fresh out of prison. Most really don’t give a fuck about you, or any one else. Child sex offenders will find there ways to vulnerable children. Rapists will rape. Drug addicts will do unspeakable acts if they think it will get them their dope. Gang members will walk out the doors and go right back to the gangs. Shooting each other, and innocent people. Its frickin scary to just sit there and listen to the conversations, and watch the behavior.
I think about just how much alike I was to these people. Oh don’t get me wrong, if I were to stop doing what I do each day. I would still be the same as they are. In fact the only thing that separates me from their behavior, is my faith. My belief in our lord Jesus Christ. And the twelve steps of NA. And my knowing I can never ever stop living the life style I live now.
Its truly amazing how much clarity one can achieve when they put forth the effort to become a better human being. Exercising integrity without reservation in every thing you do. Be humble no matter what. Be truthful in all your affairs. Be honest and critical of yourself. Most of all love genuinely.
So I realize I will always be sexualy deviant in my thinking. Maybe not to the extant I was. But I still sometimes have rape fantasies. Yet I really don’t think about sex to often. When I get pissed off, I sometimes have the fantacies or thoughts about raping or hurting the person I am mad at.
So I’ve come a long way from the person I was twelve years ago. I really believe in the thought that true acceptance of self, only comes with a very thurough and honest willingness to look at ones self and not hold any thing back.
-Brent Brents 8-25-16
Tag Archives: sexual offenders
You should have a healthy reserve for the guy fresh out of prison
Filed under Brents' writings
Will i go to heaven or hell?
Faith! Enterestingly enough having a faith has mellowed me a lot. I’m not a prison zealot. I take my faith seriously. Will i go to heaven or hell? How much good does one have to do to earn that trip to the gates of heaven. I’m Not sure that hell is where i’ll wind up. I have faith in our Lord. Prayer is my weapon of choice these days. I know, There will be lots of nay sayers. All I know is i can make peace with The person who wakes up in my bed each morning, Never forgetting that I’m in this cell for a reason. I do my making up for my past by prayer and doing this. I don’t know how much these posts help, assuming they do. But i Live for the cause so to speak. “Prevention.” How do we stop Making Sexual offenders. My faith is my way to keep me on this path.
-Brent Brents 5-1-15
I can’t change the past
Note from Amy: In November, the following question was sent to me by a reader through this website, Diary of a Predator:
I do have a question for Brent. Since prison is punishment and supposed to help prevent crimes as a deterrent, do you think it is fair ( yes, I know nothing is fair) that you were granted an identity change and transfer in exchange for admitting guilt for what you had done? The victims were not granted anything special and their identities are easily found on the internet. Do you feel that your punishment should be met with honesty, even if that means you will be targeted?
I conveyed the question to Brents, and this week I received his reply in the mail:
So i have been asked to answer whether or not the out of state housing stipulation is fair or Not. Well first let me say that no matter what Mitch Morrissey is telling people, I’m Not doing easy time. I’m doing the same administrative segragation time i would be doing in Colorado. Acutaly i have less privaledges here. Too bad huh.
So am i being to those i victimized. I believe there is Nothing fair about what i did, Nor can I ever do enough to be fair. So No, Not yesterday, today, or in the future. I stick to the process of staying out of arguing fair or unfair.
The bottom line is, how can i best serve out The justice those i hurt deserve. I believe spending each day for the rest of my life, aware of what i have done. The evil, The pain, The wrecking of people’s lives. And working w/ Amy on this web site. I can’t change the past, but i can hopefully help change the future. At least i am trying to do some good. Most sexual offenders go to prison and don’t care about what or who they hurt. Or do anything to make themselves better.
Brent Brents 12-15-13
many sexual offenders abuse animals
Oh before i forget…Animalabusers.org. Animal legal defense fund. Ok I encluded this one because many sexual offenders Abuse animals in their youth and on into adulthood. I didn’t know for sure if you would see this as relavent. I can tell you in most of the sexual offender groups i have been about half the men and kids admitted to violently abusing animals. Myself encluded.
There has also been a great deal of research into Animal Violence and criminal behavior. I had a rage even back then, that cruel and saddistic. It scared the hell out of me. Poor cat paid one hell of a price for my rage.
-Brent Brents 10-11-13
Filed under Uncategorized
a larger percentage are rape, abuse or incest survivors
Note from Amy: Brent Brents suggested I check out the information about a documentary called “Searching for Angela Shelton.”
It does indeed look worthwhile. This is what he said:
She (Angela) goes all over the us talking to the Angela Sheltons she can find who will talk to her. She is an incest survivor. A majority of the Angela’s she finds (not all) but a larger percentage, are rape, abuse, or incest survivors. One woman she meets keeps track of sexual offenders for a living. She helps Angela confront her father.
Filed under The story
all people have aspects of goodness and evil within
I received this thoughtful letter the other day through this website, and it’s definitely worth sharing:
I heard you on Colorado Matters and felt great empathy to you; I hope to know you someday. My best friend, Shannon Moroney, married a man who, to all who knew him, was absolutely wonderful. Still, a month after their wedding, he violently kidnapped and raped two women, then turned himself in, pled guilty to Canada’s highest penalty –violent offender– and is serving a life sentence. Shannon (and her parents, many friends, and I) still maintain contact with Jason who shares many similarities with Brent.
Though his crimes were horrific, the person I know was kind, held my infant daughter, and treated me, and especially Shannon, with kindness. Last fall, Shannon published a book that I hope you get to read someday, THROUGH THE GLASS. Currently, it is only available in Canada through Doubleday, but it will be coming to the US in the fall.
I am so grateful to you for sharing the story of the criminal who is never, as we wish he/she were, purely evil. I believe, as I think you do, that all people have aspects of goodness and evil within. Jason was also sexually abused as a child. When Shannon has been confronted with the accusation “well, all victims of sexual assault don’t become sexual offenders,” her response is, “thank God.”
Why some people do turn to crime is a source of great sadness for those of us who have cared for and even loved victims of crime and the offenders themselves. Please feel my support and understand my gratefulness for telling Brent’s story.
I look forward to reading your book.
Filed under The story
Letter to Natasha, part two: No One wants a rapist or child molester to bite or duck out
Here’s part two of the questions from Natasha, a reader:
I don’t believe harsher prison sentences are necessarily the answer, not in any humane way, plus they will get out eventually, and we are naive to think longer sentences = change people. I did come across some research that discussed how sexual predators are very predictable when constantly monitored (in free society); I feel that this would be far cheaper and more effective than imprisoning them.
I also feel a huge problem is the sexism and misogyny that is rampant in male-dominated policing and the police state we live in period in this eurowestern culture, including the courts. Many of these men in charge Just.Don’t.Get.It. and they are the ones making life altering decisions for survivors of rape and abuse. This woman-hating trickles down the inherently rotten hierarchy (as they all are) from politicians right down to the cops. Sure there are good ones out there, but this is not the majority. And I don’t have any answers because this system is enforced on us with violence, so any radical overhaul will be met with violence. This is where I often get stuck with my thinking…
I feel that prisons as they stand today are horrible places and dehumanizing and in no way “corrective” or “rehabilitating”, they only make distressed prisoners more distressed. I wish there was a medium — something like constant supervision of violent prisoners in order to ensure safety of self and others, but with some humanity and compassion attached to it. May I ask, what would be your ideal vision if you could wave a wand and make it happen, past mistakes aside? -Natasha
Answer from Brent:
As for an ideal vision, I hope, deeply hope that more and more people use this site for support, help, to help. That The Mental health professionals stop drawing lines in the sand on sound theories and work together to get a better handle on what it is that enables a human being to shut off the moral part of their brain and to commit violent sexual acts.
That each state prison system with sexual offenders who would be released be made to create prison environments that don’t encourage violence against them. All to often inmates will refuse treatment and be insincere in there treatment if they feel threatened. Oh I’m Not saying baby them. And if you want my honest opinion i agree with many that if a person who continues to show certain behaviors in prison should be considered for civil commitments. And any offender over the age of 35 as well.
I think the registries are good and should be more hands on supp0rtively, and less agressive in the treatment of parolees and those discharged from prison. If you keep kicking a dog it will eventualy bite or run. No One wants a rapist or child molester to bite or duck out. If they have no sence of conformity outside of prison and people to turn to for help, then there is garunteed failure in the system.
And Natasha my ideal vision is that the system get its shit together where Kids are concerned. From parents to teachers, mental health, family and friends. If you think a child is being abused cry out for that child. If we help the children we can eliminate alot of people from becoming like me.
Just as children are our future hope, they are also likely to become our predators. Especialy if we keep Making them fight abuses alone and silently.
Oh and i agree with you on the sexism issue. But in todays society even corprate women understand sex sells. So you get less and less and less women speaking out. And far to many young girls and women willing to sacrifice Their bodies and their souls. Go to a porn store sometime and pick up a playboy. Open to the publication page. Half the people on staff are women. Its the same throughout the porn industry, the movie industry and fashion. Yes we still live in a time when women are seen as sex objects. But it doesn’t help when many of our female role models obscure the lines.
The world culture is becoming a sex sells culture. And its creating a greed in the media. The same media young and impressionable children have full 100% access to in today’s internet world.
As sad as it is The Western Culture is obsessed with sex, and this tree has to many roots and branches for the few to overcome.
Thank you for using the site. I hope you go on to have a sincere and succesfull career in psychology. I hope i answered your questions adaquately. If Not I’m always here! (Prison Humor!)
-Brent Brents 11-20-11
Reader: I honestly believe that he wanted to be different than the person he became
I read your book and have followed the blog on and off over the years but not every post. In the book I noticed that one of the themes was that Brent “fell through the cracks” and that he never got the support for his own abuse.
My question is if he ever spoke about being locked up as a teen in a Youth program for violent and sexual offenders. C.A.T House. (Closed Adolescent Treatment Center)?
I do know that he was there for rape and that he was given every opportunity possible for some sort of rehabilitation and a chance to steer himself to a different life. The program at the time was the most successful program for youth offenders in the country.
I struggle with the idea that he had been totally cast aside because the truth is somewhat different from my perspective. Each individual is affected differently and someone wanting to change is critical but I do know he had the opportunity. I may have missed it in the book but was curious if this was something he spoke to you about?
I have thought about sending this on and off over the years because I am torn in the idea that it is important for people to understand but also in the idea that he does not deserve a platform to manipulate and seek further attention. I do know that we have to help change the culture and environment that creates predators/victimizer’s and most importantly victims.
I appreciate your diligence in bringing a story forward that nobody really wanted to know or hear but is important to be told. Not for Brent but for all of the victims and for all of those who were abused and never found a voice.
January 5, 2018
I will try to address your questions and concerns in order.
The first is that one of the themes of the book is that Brent “fell through the cracks.” While I do believe the facts of his case support that statement–that he was removed from an abusive home, and then returned–I don’t know that I would call it a theme. The themes of the book, in my opinion, are abandonment, generational patterns of abuse, the effects of both victimization and predatory behavior, and transformation that involves compassion and empathy.
Please do not misunderstand that I feel sorry for him. If you’re looking for clarity on how I feel about him and his case, you may want to read “The Story” on the website, in which I say in part:
“Where does the blame belong? It belongs to Brents, certainly, for his choices. And what of his parents, and their parents before them, who perpetuated the cycle of incest, domestic violence and child abuse?”
The book does not say, nor have I, that he never got support for his own abuse. He has said that he was given the chance for therapy and treatment–I do not recall him specifically mentioning the C.A.T. House, although I could ask him–and that by the time it was offered, he was not interested.
I do not believe that he was totally cast aside. I do believe him when he says that by the age of 9, his brain was broken, and that he chose to be a predator because it gave him a feeling of power, and that was more appealing than feeling like a victim.
I stay in touch with Brents, and post blogs from him, not to give him a platform to seek attention or be manipulative, but to show some of the causes of why he became predatory; that he is, indeed, human; and to illustrate his case, because so many elements of it are indicative of what’s wrong with our social justice system. I understand you object to the blog, and I appreciate you taking the time to tell me; however, please know that I will continue it.
I also appreciate the fact that you have obviously had some experience with this topic and cared enough to write. I now have a question for you: Would you object to my posting your letter on the website? I would not include your email address, of course. Let me know.
Last, I absolutely agree with you that we have to change the culture that creates predators and therefore, survivors.
Here’s to hoping for a brighter future.
January 5, 2018
I had a chance to talk to Brents today, and he does remember being in the C.A.T. House. And he remembers a Jason who was serving time there, too, and spoke well of him.
If that’s you, then he sends a greeting.
Also, please let me know if it’s OK with you if I post your letter.
January 12, 2018
I do not want to create any issues for any of his victims or for you or lastly Brent, so I will leave it to your judgement as to what is appropriate to post.
I was in the C.A.T House with Brent. I know that the program, truly gave him/myself and others the chance to be better people and to change. While I do not think we can ever make amends for the wrongs we have done, we can live a life that serves others as well as ourselves. Has accountability and promotes healing of our own damage and demons. That was a fundamental part of the program.
I do understand that some people were not in the place to change, did not want to change or perhaps were too broken to change. I can not say for anyone but myself. I just wondered why it was something he never mentioned as it was a large portion of time for him (2 plus years I believe of intensive daily 24-7 treatment)
I can say that I have seen both sides of Brent from the perspective of a child, it breaks my heart that he continued to create more victims and I am beyond angry at who he chose to become. I am grateful that he is in a place where he has less opportunity to cause harm to others.
That being said,
I also mourn for that young man who never lived a different life, he had hopes and dreams and at least then… I honestly believe that he wanted to be different than the person he became. I understand a minuscule amount of that abuse he suffered and I appreciate him being open about it. My hope is that it will help to stop those who abuse children and those who will become abusers. I hope that Brent finds some peace and can make what remains of his life valuable to himself and those that he involves himself with. He still has a choice how he faces each day. I do think he can still use his life for the better, perhaps if he is being true this forum is just that.
I am going to read your book again tonight for some additional clarity. I watched your T.E.D talk and I applaud you for continuing to wade into a subject that most people who have not experienced have little interest in talking about as it is not shiny and pretty. More so for those who have experienced it and were/are to broken and ashamed to think they might deserve/need help before it is too late for themselves or someone else.
Thank you for the clarification and answers to my questions. In reading over them I think I could of been far more articulate and specific and have used less of a broad brush. I was mostly referencing my experience with Brent in his teens but I was about as clear as mud. I apologize for not being clear, it was uncomfortable to write and I should of taken more time. I do not think you felt sorry for him. I appreciate the balance you were able to find. Much like the Staff at the C.A.T house, my perspective is that while condemning the acts and behavior, you were able to set that aside to see the larger picture and why it is important to share and attempt to educate. But also to see a young boy who before becoming a predator was preyed upon.
January 13, 2018
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Tagged as abuse, Brent Brents, Brents, child abuse, domestic violence, incest, patterns of abuse, predator, predators, predatory, predatory behavior, rehabilitation, sexual offender, sexual offenders, survivor, survivors, victim, victimizers, victims, youth offenders