Tag Archives: Diary of a predator

Inspired by the Diary of a Predator story, this high schooler won a local competition with her play, and her troupe needs help getting to state

Ms. Herdy,
I read your entire book “Diary of a Predator,” read part of “Betrayal in the Ranks” for a school assignment, saw your Ted Talk and saw “The Bleeding Edge.” I wrote a play inspired by your story and the overall message is that no matter what hell we go through, we pay for the consequences of our actions. This was for competition since I act in a drama troupe, 0063. I won Superior for that play (highest medal) and we’re going to States an annual acting event. It is expensive so there is a Snap Raise fund where you can donate money to if your hearts allows it.

Your story should be told and retold as a lesson for humanity and compassion like you said. It has led me to see the dichotomy we all have and it has led me to see aspects in myself in Brents whilst at the same time seeing aspects in myself in the victims. It has expanded my empathy while at the same time has helped to be unafraid to show it at the most dire of times. Thank you.

Isabel

Note from Amy: In case any of you are wondering if this is a scam, it’s not–I checked it out thoroughly. And I hope that like me, you are heartened that a high school kid has the wherewithal and interest to tackle such a complex social justice issue. It gives me faith that our future generations will care enough to enact change. So if you can spare a few dollars, please help send Isabel and the drama troupe to state. Thank you.

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Reader: I have met a predator…I lived with him

Comment: I haven’t read your book but I have met a predator…I lived with him. Your video struck me deeply. I know that stare and that feeling and I know how it feels to shake with fear and pull out something from deep inside yourself and still talk with compassion. It’s changed me on levels I haven’t been able to explain to anyone I know. It’s changed every friend dynamic I’ve ever had and now even in basic conversation I see new layers of communication. Thanks for sharing your story.

Time: September 6, 2018 at 12:42 pm
Contact Form URL: https://diaryofapredator.com/contact/

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considering the perpetrators of sexual violence

Comment: Hi Amy,
I’m watching your TedTalk and I just wanted to thank you for bringing up this issue of considering the perpetrators of sexual violence. You brought up a good point-that discussing why people commit such acts and seeing their suffering is not the same as excusing their actions. Really-wonderful perspective! Have you ever seen the documentary, The Mask You Live In? This discusses how we bring up boys in society and its negative effects.
Best of luck to you in all of your pursuits!
Amber

Time: May 3, 2018 at 4:54 pm
Contact Form URL: https://diaryofapredator.com/contact/

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Reader: my emotionally and physically abusive father is not a monster – he is a sick person

I can’t believe the timing of finding your Ted Talk video. I haven’t even actually finished it, but I’m so amazed that you have articulated what I only just began to realize through my CBT sessions myself: my emotionally and physically abusive father is not a monster – he is a sick person who needs help. Although he is very intelligent, he lacks empathy and inflicted pain and suffering on those closest to him.

I’m only just starting to unravel the pain of my childhood and was recently ‘diagnosed’ with PTSD. I don’t know anyone else who’s ever gone through this, so I am in awe that you mirrored my recent breakthrough, that was years in making, into a 17 minute speech.

I’m crying right now because I am so relieved.
Thank you very much,
Ashley from Montreal, Canada

January 10, 2018

——————

Dear Ashley,
 
Thank you for taking the time to send such a thoughtful email. It’s very gratifying to get a message like this one; it reinforces that this work is worthwhile. 
 
I’m sorry to hear about the abuse your father inflicted upon you, and I applaud you for working on your healing. And I’m very glad that my TED talk was able to help you in any way. 
 
I would like to post your letter on the Diary of a Predator blog–not identifying you of course–if that would be OK with you? Please let me know. If it is, let me know how you’d like to be identified-such as first name only, or no name at all.
 
Again, thank you for writing. It’s letters such as yours that keep me motivated to do this kind of work. 
 
All my best,
 
Amy Herdy
January 10, 3018
———————–
Hi Amy,
You are welcome to post my email, and pls identify me only as Ashley… You can include Montreal.
I read more of the letters you posted and I’m surprised by how many people suffer from PTSD as a result of abuse. I guess I’m naive, because I thought it was only something soldiers had.

I wish you success in your work, and if you ever come to Montreal for a talk, I will be sure to attend 🙂

Best,
Ashley
January 11, 2018

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It is easy to hate violent people. It is harder to see what creates them.

Note from Amy: This was a reader comment sent to this Diary of a Predator website:

It is rather seldom that I have tears in my eyes when reading accounts of trauma. But I did this time. It is easy to hate violent people. It is harder to see what creates them. In Brent’s case, he was abused so horribly in childhood that it is astonishing that he survived. I bow down to Margaret in respect and admiration. How she can forgive, I don’t know. I doubt if I could forgive. It is true that hatred does more harm to the hater than the hatee. Thanks for writing this.”

-Susan

Time: January 21, 2017 at 12:41 pm

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psychiatric patients fighting globally for human rights & better treatment protocols

Reader Comment: I sure object to the listing of NIMH (National Institute of Mental Health) under the resource column on the left of the screen. NIMH does not address issues of trauma and only seeks to medicalize human experience- the disease model. NIMH would tell you Brent Brents was born with a biological disease that caused him to do the things he did, and would discount his early life experiences completely. Psychiatry, despite all evidence to the contrary, is intent on proving this model, which we fight against. I am a member of the CSX movement, psychiatric patients fighting globally for human rights & better treatment protocols, and I reference your book ALL THE TIME in our dialogues. (not to mention I lived in Denver at the the time, and also worked at 6th Avenue Pets) I plan to bring you & the book up tomorrow night (02.21) on BlogTalk Radio, Late Night with a Hero, which is why I came over to take a look at your website). –Amy Smith

Hi, Amy,
Thank you for the thoughtful feedback. I did not realize that distinction; I have now removed NIMH from the website.
It’s very gratifying that you have used the book and the website to help raise awareness. Brents would be glad as well–I will let him know.
Regards,
Amy Herdy

We are, as a people, frustrated and outraged at every step of the way.  We have few basic human rights (in Colorado, a person can be taken from their home in the middle of the night, with no information given to anyone regarding possible destination, with no due process, and can be held for five business days, which can span two weekends in some circumstances), our treatment protocols are driven by industry greed like no other, with little science to back up the subjective, nebulous criteria in the DSM, treatment guidelines or suggested medical protocols.  The drugs are addictive, seriously damaging, and cause serious comorbid disease.  New treatments in the pipeline are even worse- implants, shock & surgery- ALL with absolutely no valid or robust scientific foundation.  It is appalling, but no one really cares about us much and we are very expensive.  

The industry lies with impunity (no such thing as a chemical imbalance, for example) and now, states are using fear-driven tactics to grow the infrastructure.  There are bills pending in front of the U.S. legislature that have the stated intent of pre-emptively incarcerating up to one in five citizens who are “mentally ill” but dont know it!  The FDA is attempting to declassify shock devices and redacting ALL of the negative comments of survivors of shock and making the requirements for reporting so arduous it is difficult to get a single word to them- and then they delete it!  I have friends who have already left the United States and many more who are planning on it if the situation gets much worse.
The worse part is that trauma treatment protocols DO work, as do many socially-oriented programs and simple social supports.  Brent’s statement to the readers at the beginning of the book is one of the most important statements that can be spoken in the world today, and if all took heed, psychiatry would be eliminated in two generations.  There is no biological disease; it is trauma.  Even NIMH’s data show that, but they disregard, so I TRULY appreciate you taking that down.  I know some trauma resources, if you are interested, to refer folks to.
Thank you for being so responsive, and THANK YOU for writing Diary of a Predator.    –Amy Smith, director of MindFreedom Colorado

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how the hell do i forgive

Note from Amy: For the first time, Brent Brents was able to read the book I wrote about covering his case, Diary of a Predator: A Memoir, which includes the correspondence between us leading up to his trial and immediately after. It’s what he’s referring to here.

Our letters well, i obviously was in a state of childhood mentaly most of that first year. I see that now. As i read i was sad for the child, but angry at the man and rightly so. He was evil and scary as hell. I look back at myself and think how the hell do i forgive that person. Much less anyone else forgiving me.

-Brent Brents 1-20-16

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