MENTAL ISSUES I’LL TRY Again tomorrow
– Brent Brents, 7-31-11 10 P.M.
Category Archives: Prison
ZOOM!
Hi! 🙂 Hi! Hi! Did i tell you that on medicine the mood swing into mania is really intense? ZOOM! TO THE MOON ALICE! …So my hands get restless, but i can’t sit long because i get frustrated with whats going on in my brain. And i am often just to damn doped up to want to do anything anyway. But All of this is much easier to deal with on the meds than it was off them. So I’m on a little roller coaster but doing pretty well.
– Brent Brents, 7-30-11 10:00 P.M.
Filed under Prison
Legaly blind
So i went to the hospital today! (NO I’M NOT Pregnant!) 🙂 But i am Legaly blind and probably will need a new prescription right lense every year from now on. My left eye should be ok if i can get a new right lense each year so my right eye doesn’t continue to strain to make up for the right (Amy’s note: I think he meant “left”) eye deficiancy. My new glasses are black plastic framed, sort of rectangular. I won’t get them for 3 to 4 weeks but at least I’ll get new glasses and they won’t look like coke bottles.
– Brent Brents, 7-29-11 9 30 /p.m.
Filed under Prison
How many guys like me
Well my day was pretty laid back. I’m still a bit hung over from the Depakote dosage raise. It’s getting better. You know i am beginning to wonder if i have hurt myself by being stubborn about the meds all these years. I can’t say the outcome would have been any different than it was. But it does leave questions in my mind. How many guys like me could benifit from simply being honest about their mental status and takings Meds if Need be. The thing i keep in my mind now is that i can’t go back and speculating only makes the guilt and shame worse.
–Brent Brents, 7-18-11
Filed under Brents' writings, Prison
Deaf as Deaf can be
This fat Nazi piece of shit keeps running his mouth. Trying to mind everyones business but his own. Today he decided to expand his list. No Sweat though. You know me. Deaf as Deaf can be when i want to be. But i did have one good and very positive aspect of my day. I saw the Dr., and it was a good meeting. She upped my Depakote to 750 mgs A.M. and P.M. And also put me on a medicine called Clomipramine (I think) at night for my Compulsive disorder. So wish me luck. And she put a referal in for me to get an eye exam asap. Not that that will do any good. But She’s concerned one of my other Meds is causing me to maybe have miopia.
–Brent Brents, 7-7-11
Filed under Prison
Hate no hate
This has been one fucked up week. They Gassed a guy downstairs. So Naturally we all got gassed to a degree. 😦 And Now i have a really shitty headache. My calf still hurts but not to bad. And I’M FUCKING SICK OF BEANS! I’m a virtual Methane powered human for these last two days…
My brain is fucked up sleep, no sleep. Hate no hate, Bite tongue hard. Ignore certain c/s. Try not to let the sudden Roller Coaster of emotions kill me.
–Brent Brents, 6-19-11
Filed under Brents' writings, Prison
I’m walkin a fine line
The DR is now two weeks late on seeing me. She said the second of June. I know she has alot of us to see. And its not easy. But i am Not liking the medication process right now. These Mood swings are 2005 Mood Swings. If the drugs make it worse when they stop working i might not Make it.
I was really Feeling ok for a bit. Even with the side effects of the Zoloft i liked Not having to worry about the physical part of the one problem. What if they can’t find a non Zombie combination of Meds Amy .I don’t want to be one of those people who i saw at the state hospital when i was there. They were so pathetic and barely human.
I can’t understand why the Depakote just shut off. And i hate the intensity of the Mood Swings. I’m walkin a fine line.
–Brent Brents, 6-17-11
Filed under Brents' writings, Prison
my Bipolar disorder and Compulsive behavior
6-12-11
Sir on my treatment plan it says i need help and to work on Mental health issues. I am working with Dr on medication and that aspect stabulizing my Bipolar disorder and Compulsive behavior disorder. But how can i get the other stuff done if mental health treatment is Not offered? …Any ideas on counseling or other options? Thank you.
-Offender’s kite, or note of a request or complaint, written by Brents
Response from Dept of Corrections: I will try to pull you out this week or next to discuss your concerns.
Filed under Brents' writings, Prison, Psychiatric evaluations
being a Normal human being is No easy thing
I did know by definition what Empathy was then. I went thru to many sexual offender programs and Anger management courses and counseling sessions Not to. I knew that i should have listened to my gut when it said what i was about to do was wrong. Yes i had a clear sense of right and wrong. I think i even had a tiny bit of empathy. But on an ignorant scale. 911 i was shocked and hurt. When my favorite race car driver died i cried. I had more feelings for the suffering of animals than i did people.
I can’t say if it has been that i am finaly maturing. My facing the hard truth bout myself. The love and care that my friends and i share, or the simple willingness to open myself up and explore Me regardless of what i or anyone else discovers. That have given me the ability to experience Empathy. I like to think it is a combination of all.
But what i do recognize is that being a Normal human being is No easy thing and i used to many excuses to be “Not Normal” And Caused far to many people to suffer needlessly.
— Brent Brents
Filed under Brents' writings, Prison
i am damn glad i can feel what i do
I have been asked this question, Amy has. So Many people wonder if violent people are capable of Empathy. I feel ashamed of my answer to be honest. It is Not easy to say that it really is a question of my Mental State. I want to give a resounding “yes!” But That would only be a lie.
As for the why or why Not i leave that to those who are in a position to study and learn such things. As for me i am damn glad i can feel what i do of empathy when i do. Because when i do the world sure is better. And i don’t feel like a giant creep. He the creep i hate. He is unfortunately me and i really wish he wasn’t. Regardless of what people think, I Never did enjoy what i did. That was a very violent, bitter, angry and emotionally screwed up animal. One who hurt people and None of those people deserved that.
— Brent Brents
Filed under Brents' writings, Prison
Diary of a Predator 