Tag Archives: predator

A Reader Weighs in on Chemical Castration

Note from Amy: I posted a comment from convicted serial rapist Brent Brents about chemical castration, and it prompted an interesting response from a reader in Montreal, Canada, who wrote to this Diary of a Predator website that he turned to that as an alternative after having sexual relationships with both women and men. The original post from Brent Brents and the reader’s response to it are below:

Well my only real issue lately is my OCD. It’s real real hard (No Pun intended) to Not want to masturbate or Push the fantacies out of my head. I can’t masturbate because of the meds anyway. Chemical Castration so to speak. You might i would be sad or upset by that. Honestly No I couldn’t be happier about that part of my life. It sure makes it easier to push the fantacies aside and eases the compulsion to masturbate or wash my hands every 5 minutes. Because I equate the fantacies with dirty hands.

 

-Brent Brents 3-13-2013

Reader comment:

Castration is not all that bad, there are some bad and some sides. I’m not a sex criminal but I’ve used anti androgen for 8 years. I can’t produce testosterone any more.

In 1995 at 42 y.o. I search infos on the web about castration. I’ve discovered Yahoo groups and Eunuch .org. I found out about chemical castration and I started to used a natural product called “Saw Palmetto”  this acts like “finasteride” an anti androgen. The transition went smooth. Within few months I could no longer get an erection and it didn’t bothered me because I had no desire for sex. Like other chemical castration this doesn’t eliminate all sex drive but brings it to a low level not enough to have an urge for sex. So I was satisfied being sexless. This went on for 8 years, this is why I said castration is not all that bad, other wise I’d have quit long before. During that period I was doing office work. I already had some side effects but they were bearable. I switched jobs to field work, first I thought I was out of shape but it went from bad to worst and I couldn’t do it any more. The castration side effects were just unbearable and I was very depressed. I quit the anti androgen, after few months my T level remained close to castration level. In 2005, my doctor suggested me to start Testosterone Replacement Therapy and I am on it since then. I’ve regained my sexual functions but my libido is still under control. I rarely have sex, perhaps once a year. I suggest to all castrated men to be very cautious about theirs health, eat healthy, take vitamin D and calcium, exercise everyday, keep your weight under control and don’t expect to work as hard as intact men. Castrated men are diminished men. If you remain fit you should avoid castration side effects. Good luck to all.

You may post it if you want perhaps this could help others. I’m opposed to mandatory castration for sex criminals but I support castration as therapy not only for criminals  but for all men who ask for it. There are a lot of men that wish to be castrated , we all have our own reasons.
-Jacques 6/28/2013

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Reader: It takes courage

Note from Amy: The following comment was sent to this website about the book, Diary of a Predator: A Memoir, which is about the case of serial rapist Brent Brents and how covering the case impacted my life.

Comment: I just purchased your book from Amazon.com. I was interested in it after watching Brent’s story this morning. I admire your courage. It takes courage to decide to do what your heart tells you to do regardless of what other people think. You knew you would be judged even though you chose not to judge Brent. That is what makes you remarkable. Always remember that. I want to read this book before I comment further.

I am a survivor of the 1950s foster care system. I wrote a book about it: Survival of the Fittest…One Child’s Life in the Foster Care System. My family’s response? Anger, even though I changed all of the names. But, writing that book saved me really. I was angry all of my life until I wrote that book.

Take care, Amy and God’s speed.

Time: Wednesday June 5, 2013 at 7:01 am

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South African Reader: “Parents make their kids into killers”

Note from Amy: The following comment was sent to this website, Diary of a Predator, after the South African viewer watched the Paula Zahn show about the Brent Brents case:

I have watched Brents story and as i view this site and read everyones comments i notice that what Amy is trying to explain is that its not about Brent but everywhere, he is the guinea pig. We dont know how many become like brent in the world, there isnt just a black and white but many shades in between.

What is more disturbing about this is the amount of abuse happening and mostly to children. Look at how many of you wrote saying you were abused. I am truly saddened and this all boils down to 2 people being careless, getting pregnant and going through with it even though they dont want kids. Then taking it out on them! People who are labelled parents earn it! By providing a safe haven, loving and protecting no matter how poor you are.

I have a son who is 4 i live in a tiny home, but my God i dont know what the future holds but i make sure my son has food, shelter, education and that he is loved and that he is not a burden and that even though i too was in an abusive home where my father did drugs, drank, got abusive etc, and raped by men. I make it my goal to not let my son become like that. That he will know his home is safe.

I live in south africa which has the highest rape, murder etc in the world but you dont hear what happens here. Everyone says brent had a choice, no he didnt! From the time he was born he didnt, so how can you expect him to know how to make a choice or expect him to know what that means or have logic or any other in this situation. Parents make their kids into killers . They learn from what they see and experience, not from what they are told.

Time: Monday May 13, 2013 at 2:09 am

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Diary of a Predator: A Memoir Wins An Independent Publisher Book Award

It was gratifying news: Diary of a Predator: A Memoir has been selected as a silver medalist in the 2013 Independent Publisher Book Awards in the category “Best Adult Non-Fiction Personal E-Book.”

Altogether, there were 382 medals awarded out of 5,200 entries, so I’m honored by the distinction. And it’s further testament that Diary is not just about the case of serial rapist Brent Brents; rather, it’s a very personal account of how my life was changed forever after being assigned that story.

https://i0.wp.com/www.independentpublisher.com/images/ippy_silvermedal_LR.jpg

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Reader Question: Isn’t There Something That Can Be Done?

This thought-provoking message was sent to this website earlier this week after its author read my book, Diary of a Predator: A Memoir, which is the true-crime account of the case of serial rapist Brent Brents:

I could not put the book down, read it so fast probably didn’t digest it well.  What heart break and the amount of victims is just unbelievable.  As an entire country, isn’t there something that can be done on the education of children and parents to GENERATE solid parenting?  So much anger and hurt.  Maybe Brents emulated what he felt, experienced, and felt, but at least 2 generations before his are the responsible parties, for the constant abuse that was rained on he and his siblings.  Just find it hard to imagine people live, work, and socialize daily, go home and beat and rape each other  and their children!  It must change!!

  -Nancy

 

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Rape only happens when a predator, attacker or some shithead decides to take advantage

Note from Amy: In the following post, Brent Brents is referring to the Steubenville, Ohio rape case.

I believe in cases like this where the victims either drink or do drugs or are doped by some asshole These victims have a lot more guilt they deal with. Not to say they should. I think they think it is their fault for drinking or druging. But they shouldn’t feel guilt. Rape only happens when a predator, attacker or some shithead decides to take advantage of the victims in those situations. Like a high school football player who thinks he’s above the rules.

-Brent Brents 3-19-13

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the leap from feeling the pain of loneliness to Rage

In February 2005, Brent Brents went on his final and most horrific crime spree, of which I write about in Diary of a Predator: A Memoir,  the book that is based upon his case. Recently he sent me a letter reflecting on this awful anniversary, and this is what he said:

I hate this part of February. I still can’t forgive myself for any of it. Valentine’s Day is like this big ugly reminder of all the hate, rage, and lost feeling. Over the years since I’ve been back in prison, I’ve come to realize that being Lonely really does fuck up ones thinking If you let it. Add Loneliness, Anti Social, and rage and you get one very cowardly, angry person who truly doesn’t know how to enteract or Communicate his desire to belong. I really didn’t have the mental health stuff all in check like i thought.  So it was easy for me to make the leap from feeling the pain of loneliness to Rage.

Once i began I didn’t want to stop. The more i did, the more i wanted to release the rage i had kept inside all those years. It’s difficult to reconcile me Then, to me Now.

Why is it we fight the Mental health Diagnosis. Years ago i was told i should probably be medicated. Maybe it would have helped. I can’t say for sure. But i doubt it i liked my drugs and the violence to much. But Now i enjoy the drug free life, I like knowing i have No stress over certain things in my life.

But the bigger truth in all this is I am constantly learning New things about emotions. I like this feeling of Compasion. And empathy is painful but necissary to really understand people and their feelings. Plus it helps me to feel like a real person.

-Brent Brents 2-11-13

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my head (still attached)

So i had this dream. You were holding my head (still attached). I had died. But i had lived a long time. We were in our 70s. You Kept whispering we made a difference. You were sad but in your heart you were sure we had done what we had set out to do all those years ago. It wasn’t a bad dream.

Brent Brents on 1-20-13, referring to the purpose of the book Diary of a Predator: A Memoir.

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trying to hurt Them

Time after time from the age of 5 until I was in my 20s
I was betrayed by men and women, family and so-called
friends. Around the age of 10 I became them and I’ve been
trying to hurt Them ever since I think.
—Brent Brents, April 22, 2005

From the book Diary of a Predator: A Memoir

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Viewer: “Indeed we are not the one to judge another”

Note from Amy: I received the message below to this website, Diary of a Predator, earlier this week, after a viewer saw an interview with me regarding the case of Brent Brents featured on the show, “On the Case with Paula Zahn.”

Messages like this are always interesting to receive, and sometimes gratifying, especially when I asked the writer where he saw the Paula Zahn show: “Belgium.”

There are no borders when like-minded people relate to one another.

-Amy

Dear Amy,

“We are all connected and responsible for each other.” –Very well said. People sending hate mails to you are not in connection with themselves and do not understand the reason of our existence, the reason of our being. They keep the focus on the negative energy, thus enhancing this negative energy with all consequences for the future.

The negative energy hasn’t been neutralized or turned into positive energy, spiritually speaking. However you’ve at least neutralized the negative energy created by the acts of Brent. Universally speaking, you’ve taken a big step in order to try to understand Brent and by doing so you were faced with your own mirror.

Not many people have the strength and courage to do so. I don’t even know if I would have acted the same in your case. But in the present I understand your choice and your effort, even though I’m aware that my understanding might have been different if I had been a victim or relative of a victim.Today I just saw it for the first time: “On the Case with Paula Zahn.”

Indeed we are not the one to judge another, but I can understand that it is more difficult not to judge when you’re the victim or when you are closely related to the victims.

-Clarence

Time: Sunday December 23, 2012 at 12:59 pm

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