Tag Archives: anguish

i never realy meant for you to hurt so. But it helped me.

Note from Amy: For the first time, Brent Brents was recently able to read the book I wrote about covering his case, Diary of a Predator: A Memoir, which includes the correspondence between us leading up to his trial and immediately after, in which he told me about his crimes and his motivations for committing them. That correspondence, which was often painful for me to read, is what he’s referring to here:

Watching you suffer thru my hate and anguish realy tears at my heart. I think that had i realy understood just how deeply you were hurt by alot of that stuff, i would have held back and that would have led to B.S.

So i am glad you held alot of your feelings back. Because i realy never meant for you to hurt so. But it helped me.

I cried thru much of the book. Tears of anguish at the wasted and destroyed lives. And tears of joy at all the accomplishments…

I’ve finaly started a good life. It’s full of love, compasion and even empathy. I still don’t like many people. Mostly because most people I come in contact with are full of shit. Or have some screwed up motive for trying to befriend myself and others.

So yeah the book is a stark reminder of just how vulnerable i was and still am in ways. Plus a scary reminder of the hate and rage i am capable of having and storing up, and venting blindly.

-Brent Brents 1-20-16

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