These fricken kids act like children. And i get annoyed real easy w/ certain things. We have 1 guy who gets really stupid w/ his mouth. Telling the cops shit like he’ll tie them up and make them watch while he beats thier kids w/ a ballpien hammer.
What kinda of shit is that. I dont want 2 hear that shit. He’s lucky i’m not like i was ten yrs ago. I aint best buddies w/ the C/Os, but that kinda of talk about hurting kids is purely sick and fucked up. So yes today has been agrivating at best. But i have been giving up on my need to control my surroundings. That includes the people in it.
Man emotionaly i feel every bit of 100 today. This abilify is a God send. W/out it, i’d be hell on wheels today. The stuff has really helped my awareness as far as recognising my different moods. The depacote didnt help me. I was always tired and burned out.
I’m alive w/ this stuff. Not manic crazy, but alive, even though today is a bad day. I still feel ok about me. I’m not plotting 2 hurt any 1. Not feeing that crazy sick feeling in my tummy i get when i get angry. Yes i was pissed off at the dude. But what good would it do 2 hold on 2 it. Not a damn thing but get me into trouble. So all is good on a bad day.
-Brent Brents 4-27-18
Tag Archives: angry
Not feeing that crazy sick feeling in my tummy i get when i get angry
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Man what a shit i am
Fuck I’m Feeling old. Greg Allmans dead, Guns N Roses are classic rock. Trump the chump is president. What the hell Else can get weird for me. But hey what else can i expect I’m an old soul and i missed my decade.
So been thinking alot about [two boys he molested] and what they are like now. I wonder if [one of them] is fucked up or if his natural compasion and Intellegence have carried him thru life and helped him get over what i did to him. [the other boy] i think will be an angry person. Not just because of me. But his whole situation. I just hope i didn’t Fuck them up too bad.
So back to [the first boy]. I’m not sure why i still care, but i do. I guess partly because i really gave a shit about him then. Plus he reminded me so much of me at that age. I just knew i fucked up so bad with him. He really trusted me and loved me. I still remember the first time he called me dad how big my heart swole up w love and pride. Man what a shit i am for hurting him like that. Poor kid was so confused about stuff. Do you know he apologized to me secretly one day for telling. God what a bastard i was. I just hope he became a good man w/out all those poisons i had as i grew up. I realy tried to love him right.
-Brent Brents 6-11-17
Filed under Brents' writings
My trauma will be with me for the rest of my life but I’m a fighter
Amy- I watched your whole video on Have you ever met a Monster. I will be honest, at first when I started to watch it I couldn’t listen objectively. I was unable to understand from the rapist’s point of view because I usually don’t have compassion for them. When I watched your video for the second time, I watched the whole thing and my views were changed a little. You are right, we need to change the way we view monsters.
Brent Brents- I understand exactly how you feel, you feel angry and betrayed by those around you. I’m so sorry for all the trauma you went through as a young boy. It wasn’t your fault and you didn’t deserve it.
I know it’s difficult. I’m angry at the fact he got zero help..no one saw what was going. I’m not pitying him, I feel sad for his inner child…. It’s awful. In my own trauma I definitely am angry that my abuser got away with it and that the foster parent at the time chose to ignore it. But I’m so lucky to have gotten adopted into a loving and supportive family.
Time: January 28, 2018 at 7:52 pm
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Tagged as abuse, abuser, angry, betrayed, Brent Brents, Brents, child, child abuse, compassion, fighter, have you ever met a monster, inner child, monster, monsters, rapist, trauma