Ya know i have said maybe 10 words in Four days to anyone. Probably less because most were yes, no please and Thank you. Not that i want to make friends in here. But when you hear people conversing all around you. Laughing and enjoying themselves, and No one will speak to you. It’s so lonely. Locked away with only my own thoughts for company. Now aint that grand. I wonder if anyone has ever died of loneliness. It’s to bad i am not a complete narcisist then i could be happy with just myself. But i am Not. Just to hear someone say something nice or kind to me would make my day. Sure once a while they say your welcome or a thank you. But Seldom. I feel like the Leper. At some point i am going to have to learn to forgive myself but thats along way off, i think. So not only am i isolated, understandably paranoid, Lonely, hated and a bit mentaly unstable, i loath myself deeply. So hey it’s a grand life. Am i having a pity party? NO. Just really down and alone. No one should feel this way, it sucks! Plus i am pretty Scared about having to adjust to population again. Prison can be a raw ugly beast with rules only an animal could live by and i don’t want to be an animal any more.