The beatings, and fear, and rape that permiated my life

So It was pretty cold the other Night. And I woke up cold and having to pee. And immediately went back to my childhood. How i would wake up cold and wet and in fear of him either catching in the bathroom, wanting a blow job, or finding out i wet the bed.

The beatings, and fear, and rape that permiated my life back then. It’s surprising what can trigger those memories. And even now I still wake with a start Now and then. Feeling that old fear, even though I haven’t wet the bed since i was 13.

And I’m still able to know that old feeling of fear angers Me. It’s Vulnerable and i don’t like it. No One does, I forget that sometimes. And i get wrapped up in my own head and emotions, So i forget that I’ve caused so many others these same emotions.

I always hope that those i hurt are able to forget me and live free of the hell that myself and others cause thru rape and abuse.

-Brent Brents 1-26-14

1 Comment

Filed under Brents' writings

One response to “The beatings, and fear, and rape that permiated my life

  1. Susie

    Your Aunt Nola never forgot what he did to your cousin when they visited in Arizona. She was only 7yrs old. I am your cousin Nola’s daughter your Father’s sister was my Mother.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s