Diary of a Predator: A Memoir is now available at Barnes & Noble book stores, such as this location in Boulder, Colo. | Photo by Amy Herdy
When I first started working on the true-crime book about serial rapist Brent Brents that became Diary of a Predator: A Memoir my husband told me he would no longer go to bookstores with me.
The reason? I would walk past some of the trite or atrocious titles on the shelves and start to feel depressed. It wasn’t that I thought Diary of a Predator was so much better; I was just convinced it had a story–and a message–that was worthwhile, and I fretted the book would never get a chance.
I hoped, but did not expect, that I would see it on the shelf of a major bookstore. Publishing statistics show there are more than 100,000 new books published every year, yet most bookstore chains (like Barnes & Noble) stock only a fraction of them–about 10,000 titles.
So I was very happily shocked when I got a call from a buyer for Barnes & Noble a few weeks ago. She said they planned to put Diary of a Predator: A Memoir in some of their top true-crime-selling stores around the country.
One such store is in Boulder, at 30th and Pear Street. I visited it the other day, and sure enough, there was Diary of a Predator: A Memoir, right on the shelf in the “True Crime” section. It’s hard to describe the feeling I got when looking at my book there on the shelf. Diary of a Predator: A Memoir is the culmination of a career covering crime and out of that, the five years I devoted to the stubborn notion that this book would inspire and educate people.
And that’s the most gratifying part of all: Hearing from folks that reading this book left them wanting to be a better person, or spread some good in the world.
So thank you, Barnes & Noble, for helping to get Diary of a Predator: A Memoir out there.
Diary of a Predator 
Hello,
When you think of a Predator or Military Sexual Trauma (MST) you think women being raped by men, but there were over 20,000 males raped in 2009 who have been raped too. When you think of Male who has Military Sexual Trauma (MST) you think male on male rape. I am a Survivor I have Military Sexual Trauma (MST) PTST and no male has ever touched me. I hope your book can talk about women Predators too.
It was my Supervisor during the week and she was a female. She was in a position that she used her higher rank and position to get what she wanted. Then the threats came in… but I reported it after it took the best of me. Once I reported it to the military they didn’t remove her or change her position. If the role was reversed I as a male would have been moved that day no questions asked. But she got to stay while they investigated it. If they ever did investigate it I still remember it like it was yesterday, step by step. I want to stop thinking and dreaming about it but it is hard when the person who violated you works at the Dallas VA Hospital where I go for medical care and have been since 2007.
I had her as a supervisor for another year and thoughts of suicide was in my head every time I came to work. She would harassment and embarrassed me in from of my peers. My doctor put me on 2mg bars of Xanax, 280 pills a month. Then I became an addicted to them. Today I still have to take something for my anxiety; because I see her every time I go to the Dallas VA Hospital for medical appointments.
When I came off active duty I didn’t leave my house for over two years which means no medication for my injuries and Military Sexual Trauma PTSD (MST) or my Combat Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I was too scared to go to the Dallas VA to get treatment because I found out that she worked there. Yes, it had been over ten years and it still had a big impact on my life today.
Today I still cannot sleep, have anxiety, panic attacks, and broken relationship with my fiancée who I had dated over five years. I became a work alcoholic and buried myself in my work. I felt ashamed like I did something wrong. When I reported it not more than five minutes I received a phone call from both of our supervisor who started screaming at me as loud as she could over the phone.
Telling me I was a lair and why would I do this to her. This went on for over 30 minutes I broken down over the phone and told her that I was telling the truth but she didn’t believe me. Once I got off the phone I went and told the head person in charge of the hold battalion during the week days. She was also my First Sergeant on the weekends which means she was using her military rank as in uniform during the weekend and during the week days she was in civilian position. She was what they called dual status, reservist and civilian personnel.
I had never in my life taken pills. I was the Division Master Fitness Trainer. I was in excellent shape before I was transferred to this new unit because our other unit was deactivated. She was on me my first day there and I told her I was not interested. I kept my personal life away from my professional life. She would not take no for an answer and I didn’t know anyone in this unit or who I could trust or who would believe me. I mean come on a woman wants a man…most men would had jumped on it. That is what all the men kept telling me.
I had a perfect career and was on fast track up to this point. I was an E5 with 4 MSMs awards which this is unheard of in the military. When you hear of Military Sexual Trauma (MST) PTSD remember it’s not only females, or male on male rape. Women are part of this mess too and they will use their rank and position to get what they want. I will never forget the words she used…. I always get what I want.
I have been asking for Military Sexual Trauma MST treatment for male soldiers but they keep telling me I don’t qualified because mine was a female, not a male on male rape. I do not believe I would get any support for several years from the Dallas VA Hospital but they keep telling me do this first or take these pills. I have been given so many pills to take that I almost killed myself several times. This letter is in no disrespect to my fellow sister-in-arms back then and today, but I felt that my story needed to be told because I know it is still going on today.
Thank you for letting me share my story.
Richard and my Service Dog Military Millie